I hate today.

My papaw passed away today at age 86. This day has felt like it's lasted forever...I'm emotionally drained and exhausted. I used to take Peyton with me to his house and sit with him since he couldn't be by himself after his stroke. You know what his #1 complaint was? No, it wasn't his lack of coordination, wasn't his inability to walk and get around like he used to, wasn't his inability to speak the way he used to...#1 complaint was his inability to read his Bible. Papaw was a godly man, and loved the Lord. You could always find a Bible by his nightstand, and one by his recliner chair in the living room (where he sat all the time). It frustrated him to no end to not be able to read it. He could see the letters on the page and could read some of them, but the words in the sentence would get jumbled and confuse him. He did also complain that he was never going to get in his car to drive to McDonalds to people watch. :) Gotta love papaw!

A few days ago my sisters, mom and I went to the nursing home to visit him. He looked pretty bad...you could tell he didn't weigh hardly anything, and his color looked bad too. The cancer had taken over his body and he no longer had the desire to eat and drink. He was alert though, and tried to talk to us. He did say he couldn't wait to go to Heaven to see "mom" (aka. my mammaw). He kept telling us "when I die, I want you to..." and would babble on. So I know he knew it was coming soon. Funny thing is, is that tomorrow would've been his and mammaw's anniversary...so I am glad they get to spend it together. It's been some 20 years since they got to do that.

No one ever likes death or funerals...but I must say it makes it so much easier to cope with when you know for sure that person is in a much better place with our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.